The place of transition has begun. The air is so thick it's uncomfortable!
Jason seems to be expressing the internal conflict of his transition in two ways:
1) Asks the same questions over about what his life in America will be like.
2) Wants to visit and say good-bye to every person he has known in Kiev.
The irrestible pull of the future and the anchor-like tug of the past.
Being around someone going through this kind of life change perspective has deepened and as well as heightened my parental awareness of the turmoil he may be experiencing. It's unsettling to imagine the amount of trust it must take. Of course, it's exciting to think about the new life because it's been lived with "small tastes" of Americana on two previous visits to the U.S. So, he has a touchpoint of sorts to connect with regarding his expectations.
And, at the same time, it must also be frightening. With nothing but a shoe box of treasures and memories, everything else will be new, different or strange. Where will you run if you need to? Who will help if you need it? Right here everyone speaks your language (but one), soon no one but you will speak it. How will you be understood when you want or need something?
It may be like a prisoner after many years of institutionalization soon to be released into full freedom of life. The fear of the new and uncomfortable. The "what I know" is more comfortable than the "what I don't know."
Like the place of transition when the baby is about to birthed - everything goes into a whole different place (for the whole family) - the exictement is heightened, the anticipation and dreams increase, the warfare and pain mazimize all the while pushing into the new thing.
AH! The tranisition must occur, will occur and is occurring - how long will it last? No one ever knows! All we know is that it's worth it because it is God's plan.
Lord, we know that this adoption is part of your great big plan. We know that you love Jason so much that you would rescue him and guide him to exactly where you have today. Your word says: For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11
Such insight you have into the complexities of the process in a young adoptee's mind. I hope Jason continues to know he is on the right path and can't possibly have a better or more loving opportunity than with you. Soon, you will all be home together soon!see you soon!
ReplyDeleteWow! Reading your words tonight brought tears to my eyes. What insight you have!
ReplyDeleteWe finished our first court hearing today, and have our second tomorrow. The judge talked to us about the leap of faith that these children are taking, and were we ready to handle it. We pray that with the love and support of our friends and family, we are ready to help them through this transition!
What a crazy adventure it must seem to them!
God Bless you on your family's journey!!
As soon as our Sasha comes home, we will get the boys together. We will keep praying.
ReplyDeleteDave sez,
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for sharing this important, personal part of the story!